The Band – High On The Hog

High On The Hog (1996)

C 

1. Stand Up 2. Back To Memphis 3. Where I Should Always Be 4. Free Your Mind 5. Forever Young 6. The High Price Of Love 7. Crazy Mama 8. I Must Love You Too Much 9. She Knows 10. Ramble Jungle

This is the same pointless, shitty, legacy-tainting album as the last pointless, shitty, legacy-tainting album. It’s the same combination of clueless old white guy R&B and by-numbers roots rock, anyway, except with even fewer original songs (zero, to be exact, unless you count that horrific instrumental at the end). And whenever they hit on something kinda rocking, they run it into the ground with painfully slow tempos, creaky vocals, and listless jamming (“Stand Up,” “The High Price Of Love,” J.J. Cale’s “Crazy Mama). The only real source of any tension here is the band’s mind-explodingly bizarre decision to cover En Vogue’s early 90s anti-racism hit single “Free Your Mind.” Listening to it is a bit like watching an episode of In Living Color as performed by the cast of Little House On The Prairie… one can’t help but laugh at the fact that that everything seems wrong and nobody knows what the hell is going on. But other than that anomaly, it’s just total dullsville, man. So instead of expending 900 words on just enumerating High On The Hog’s failings one by one (which I could totally do. For instance, why the hell is Rick Danko doing a bad Dylan impression on this godawful version of “Forever Young”?), I’m just gonna refer you back to the top of the page where that grotesque album cover lies. Because you know what they say… an album cover is worth a bitchy 900 word review.

Also, I’m gonna post a picture of my dick. Seems like the thing to do these days, especially if I ever wanna run for mayor of New York!

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Ready?

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Here it is!

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Suck it, Weiner! Literally suck it!